Catching up

Once again its been a while since my last update and the last week in particular Mistress Darkside has subjected me to some serious and sustained domination. My cock has been frequently caged and I two days is probably the longest it has been in chastity for any one time. Mistress likes to free it to be washed and cleaned and then she will play with it for a while. She continues with her rules of my cock being allowed in her mouth whilst it is small and soft but at any point it gets longer than the width of her hand then it is removed and subjected to teasing and slapping at each point I reach that glorious edge point. The understanding she has of my reactions means she can now get me to the edge to the point that I leak cum but do not go to the point of a failed orgasm. I find even in a failed orgasm my ardour subsides and Mistress likes me on edge and continually requesting to satisfy her. Mistress Darkside's capacity for orgasms is amazing and I will frequently lick her beautiful pussy to climax four times in one evening and my tally for one entire day was ten powerful and distinctly separate orgasms for my Mistress. Removing my inadequate cock and lack of stamina as a 'traditional' lover from our relationship has transformed our passion and our love.

We recently had two days together and my Mistress delighted in dressing me up in various sissy outfits. The freedom of walking around the house naturally in a corset and suspenders was very exciting and I frequently found myself slipping into the submissive sissy slut role that she demands of me. I think a large part of my ability to slip into that role was the extensive discipline that I received on the first morning. Tied to a pole in our house, dressed in underwear, a mask and a ball gag she used all her whips, canes and paddles on me. The tears of pain (and excitement) as she punished me were like a release as powerful as any orgasm I ever had. When she moved onto whipping my tiny cock and exposed balls I know she was prepared to go further and I was not wrong. She has a wonderful pair of heels, not pointed but rounded toes and a broad heel but sexy as hell. As she laughed behind me as she kicked me in the balls I could see that she loved these shoes even more now. I was finally untied from the pole at which point I simply dropped to my knees and it was from there that she took delight in kicking me to the floor. With every kick to the ribs and legs I could feel her confidence in her domination growing and also her enthusiasm to hurt me more. She was trampling on my cock and balls and I amazed myself with the resilience that I have grown to her discipline and she finally whipped me to a tearful ending with her shoe on my throat pinning me to the floor. Leaving me as a pitiful state on the floor she sat back on the bed and released her breasts from her top and then instructed me to come to her to be comforted. The contrast from only a minute ago to laying between her legs, suckling on her breast was mind blowing and I loved her even more for the experience. As a submissive you give a lot of yourself and returning to the security of your mistresses arms is one of the best rewards you can have.

The next day we went shopping searching for a slutty outfit for her to make me buy but the shops were largely a disappointment. The afternoon events were anything but though. Dressed in my little see through black and purple outfit my mistress fucked me with all manner of cocks and butt plugs. We have this wonderful position where I am facing her and she is propped up on cushions just grinding myself on her cock. She will amuse herself by tugging and slapping my tiny cock. I was a snivelling little slut begging for mercy as she pulled on my bulls encouraging me to take all the 8" cock she was wearing. I have never felt such genuine fear as I did that afternoon as I could see her losing herself in the orgasm but at the same time seemingly unaware that I was begging for mercy for my balls. I had the cock buried balls deep and I could not create any more relief for my stretched balls but she relented. I had to cry out that she was scaring me to try and break the pain as she has long abandoned any recognition of my safe word. The smile on her face as she had realised that she had broken me was one of the sexiest images I have ever known. Fear is an amazing turn on and I can see that I am only at the start of this intriguing journey.

So that's where it came from!

Well I haven't exactly got this off to a great start as my blog posts still number 1. I have had many situations where I have thought that's something I should write down and I think I will just need to train myself to not want to create some masterpeice of literature and instead just get it down and out there. I kept referring to my wife as domme last time but I don't call her that in our relationship and she simply prefers her name used although obviously in a submissive way. I don't typically even refer to her as Mistress but for the purpose of this blog that is what I will use.
We recently went away for a week for my mistresses birthday. It was to be a week of exploration and it was certainily that. The biggest challenge is maintaining this lifestyle around the reality of kids, work and other pressures and we find ourselves trying to squash lots into a free day but you simply can't beat the luxury of a whole week in servitude. It was an amazing week and certainly a revelation where we found how many different 'views' there are to our relationship but all under the banner of my submission. Having done trips previously as man and wife we would have been active sexually but in a more traditional sense with 'fucking' and 'cum'. For the entire week in our new lifestyle I did not cum once and I was not allowed to put my little cock in my wife once. The worship of my mistresses pussy was the foundation of our week and I am still amazed at her capacity for orgasms from my mouth. I love her demanding me to go down and 'see to her pussy' and the reward of her orgasm each time which because we were away was always loud and passionate. My mistresses pussy is now covered with a fleece of bushy dark hair. It has been that way since we first explored the origins of my submissiveness where we used a series of lessons that were written by a dominatrix. I have been  searching for the actual website but since my mistress owns all the material I can't easily find it. Perhaps my mistress will read this blog and then post a link in the comments.

The exercises were a revelation for me and especially the questions that had been prepared typically after I had been beaten or fucked into submission. This subspace state seemed to give me access to memories that I would never had recalled as my previous self. The question was "When I first felt a feeling of submissiveness to a women?". As I lay there with my ass stinging and cradled in her lap I remembered the occasion vividly. I was a child at home (I am guessing 10-11) and we had friends of our family staying over. Although I remember referring to them as Auntie, Uncle etc they weren't actual relatives just very good friends of the family. The Auntie in question was actually a very jolly lady (as were the family) and always happy and we always looked forward to weekends where we would get together.On this occasion it was at our house and she and her husband were staying in my bedroom and all us kids had been chucked into one room as you did back then. I remember being told to go get some socks and I had run upstairs and without thinking barged into my bedroom where I was confronted with the image of my Auntie getting dressed. The image is stamped in my memory of her standing there in a black bra but more importantly a thick black thatch between her legs. At that exact point I remember her snapping at me "What was I doing?" and I blurted out that I needed socks. She snapped at me again to "Shut the door and hurry up". The combination of this naked woman towering over me and also her uncharacteristically snapping at me still makes me shiver with the thrill. As I closed the door and turned around she had still not moved and instead pointed at the draws beckoning me to get on with it. Chastised as I was I could not remove my eyes from her pussy. There was no recollection of any definition of lips or anything like that just this thick dark bush that stood out vividly. She did not hide her body but for the record I do not believe that there was anything sinister behind that. I remember her continuing to snap at me telling me to "hurry up" and at that point I got the socks she dismissed me. All the time she was standing there with her hands on her hips and pointing at where I should go. I remember trying to steal a final glance as I got to the door but its as if she sensed that and the tone in her voice that reinforced that I should leave kept my gaze away from her.
I told this story to my mistress and from that day forward she has kept her wonderful pussy thick with hair. I delight in burying my face in her mound and probing to find her large dominant clit. I was always keen to lick her in our previous life but now its my be all and end all. I am intimidated by her pussy to the point that if she does allow me to put my cock inside her it will shrivel up but also reach a peak of excitement almost immediately. My performance with my head between her thighs is far better and I crave the approving feedback of my mistress as I bring her to orgasm again and again. I delight in the knowledge that my introduction to my submission began so long ago and more importantly that I have been able to recall that in partnership with my mistress. Although as a man I am growing smaller and more insignificant I do feel my self growing through my own self awareness and openness. This is a wonderful journey and its only just begun.